Promoted to Dad

My daughter was playing a computer game. The most I feel like irritating her is when she’s focused on something. She was saying, “For members only. For members only. For members only. Ah I can buy this!” You can buy items on the game with points you earn by playing the game. The game is free to play, but you can pay real money and become a member. Members earn more points and can buy more items. She usually doesn’t complain. She knows we’re too cheap to pay for games, but she’s seems content with that. Today she unusually remarked, “Why is everything for members?” I say to her, “When you grow up, make a game that allows non-members to buy anything they want”. She says, “Good idea” with a straight face. I’m not sure at this point if she’s just saying okay to get rid of me, or because she really liked the idea. I had also implied that she should make games when she grows up, and she usually doesn’t allow me to make hypothetical career choices for her. So, I decide to dig a little deeper...

This is what a lot of our conversations sound like: Daughter: “Can I tell you what happened in My Little Pony?” Me: “Sure” Daughter: “So first princess Celestia calls all the ponies to Ponyville. Oh and Rarity, she’s making a new dress for her friend. Oh and Twilight Sparkle .. “ Me: “You have five sentences” Daughter: “Ten” My wife: “Seven” (I’m already angry about this because I would have stuck to five) I want her to learn two seemingly conflicting skills. The ability to summarize and the ability to tell a story; not five sentences that may or may not be connected. I also want two seemingly conflicting things for myself! I want to listen to all her stories in great detail, but also have time to have my own thoughts. Everyone tells me that when she’s a teenager, I won’t be able to get more than a couple of syllables from her. I hate that thought. On the other hand, I also dream about dinners where we’re talking about the news or discussing some ideas, or just enjoying the food in si...

My daughter has had walkie talkies before. They were cheap toys, and didn’t work well. They were fun for five minutes but quickly grew old. This time as we were at the toy store, she said she wanted walkie talkies again. I told her that if she didn’t get a toy, we would get her real walkie talkies. I searched online and found a pair of regular walkie talkies. I didn’t realize what a good investment I’m making at the time. We constantly use them now. Me: [static] “Breakfast is done” [Beep] Daughter: [static] “Okay. Just need to clean up and I’ll come down” [Beep] Daughter: [static] “Papi, I need help. I can’t open this” [Beep] Me: [static] “Coming. Hang on” [Beep] Sometimes we also talk to each other using the walkie talkies, even when we’re clearly within earshot. There are two other funny side effects of buying the walkie talkies. First, my daughter is now ‘teaching’ me to always use the walkie talking when not in the same room. Sometimes she has clearly heard me, ...

What is it, that's so satisfying about watching my daughter drink hot chocolate? Sometimes your job as a parent seems to be to get your child to calm down. Children are naturally in one of two states. Super excited (happy) and super excited (sad). As a parent, while you don't expect them to be completely zen or emotionless, your ideal state would be for them to be happy, but not mind blown happy. This is the state I find my daughter in, when she's sipping on hot chocolate, while reading a book. To top it, the thick chocolatey liquid also seems nutritious. It's probably not, but it looks like it. So it satisfies another primal need to provide nutrition to my offspring. I am step away from beating my chest in this hip cafe, as I type this. Oh, and the last reason why this is so satisfying. Its because we’re spending time with each other without needing to talk. So I have the luxury to ponder this question, sip on my cappuccino and even write this piece! Ah! I feel like ...

I’m a bit crazy about being on time. Okay fine, I’m obsessed about it. Every morning I’m a bit of nervous wreck, trying to get my daughter and myself ready and fed. Since I’m obsessed, there’s a sequence of steps I follow, with a set time for each step to be completed. As long as I keep meeting those timelines, I know things are in control. As soon as they slip, I lose my mind. Something that can add more stress, is an early morning meeting. I can handle it, since I’ve done those a few times. I know which steps need to be adjusted, so I can still leave the house at the same time.  This happened a few days ago. I had an early morning meeting. Now, as soon as I come out of my meeting, I expect my daughter to have changed. However, this particular morning, I come out and see her in her pyjamas. The meeting had already induced some stress, but missing the timeline! I am now in physical pain! With the pain carrying through in my voice, I ask her why she isn’t wearing her school clothe...

A few of vignettes that I’d like to remember from the last month or so. --- On Martin Luther King day, my daughter decided (unprompted) to tell us why this day is celebrated. She tells us that in the past there was segregation between white and black people. She also mentioned Rosa Parks, and since we’re relatively new to the US, we had not heard of her. As this was the first time I heard my daughter bring up race, I asked her, “so, what are you?” (implying, ‘what is our race?’). She says, “I am..” and proceeds to tell us her name. As me and my wife are laughing at the innocent answer, she asks, “What was I supposed to say?”. All I could say was, “That was the perfect answer. I expected nothing less from you.” --- I heard my daughter whistle for the first time recently. I asked her, “so you can whistle now?”. She says nonchalantly, “yes, its easier for me now since I don’t have my front two teeth”. --- Sometimes she’ll use a new word or phrase in her vocabulary, and it often impresses...

I’m starting to see that my daughter is turning out to be quite competitive. In fact we were already using this trait to get her to do stuff we wanted, without realizing what a big part of her personality this is. There are two competitions she has early in the morning, before going to school! One is with her mother. I am the judge, and I decide who’s brushed their teeth better. Almost everyday I decide that its my daughter, but on some days I call it a draw. Mainly because I like to flex my power as a judge. The other competition, for which a judge is not required, is with me. Whoever gets ready the fastest wins. I think I’ve won twice in the last three months. I’m sure its a matter of time before she figures this out, but right now, she’s very motivated to brush her teeth well and get ready fast. Maybe I’m shooting myself in the foot by typing out all of this. However, after all of this ‘gamification’ being put in practice, I only began to realize the importance of competition for h...